Tips for the Holidays
You may recall childhood holidays as a joyful time when everyone sat around and ate and talked for hours. But for a child with sensory issues, holidays can be a real problem. The change in routine and the unfamiliar sights, sounds, foods, and people can be extremely stressful. Here are ways you can help your child enjoy the holidays.
Get involved in the preparations
- Holidays are a great time to work on fine motor skills. Take a look at the craft ideas in holiday season magazines and by entering the name of the holiday you celebrate into your search engine (Google, etc.). Young children may enjoy adding colored feathers and wiggly eyes to a pine cone to make a turkey. Kids can glue large sequins or buttons onto a tree cut out from green construction paper or felt. Glue three styrofoam balls together and decorate it to make a snowman. Make a Kwanzaa Kinara or a Menorah out of clay. Use tactile desensitization techniques your OT shows you to help your child feel more comfortable touching “yucky” materials.
- Cooking is a wonderful sensory experience. Let your child help you pour, mix, blend, and decorate holiday food. Even if you’re going to someone else’s home to celebrate, help your child to prepare a special side dish or dessert to bring along.
Reduce the element of surprise
- Mark off each day on a large hanging calendar so that your child can have a picture of time passing, and be more prepared for the actual holiday. If you celebrate Christmas, buy or make an advent calendar.
- As much as possible, tell your child in advance what will happen on the holiday. Let her know who is going to be there and what activities will take place.
- Work with your child to figure out, in advance, where she can go and what she can do if she begins to feel overwhelmed. It’s much better for your child to take a break from a group gathering than to feel trapped in a situation she can’t handle. If you’re home, let her know she can politely excuse herself to go to her room if she needs some time to compose herself. But if you’re at your in-laws or other relatives, you will need to work out a place your child can retreat to. Explain that your child may need to take a break and ask where a good place might be: a bedroom, a den, or elsewhere.
Keep your child happy (even if others don’t understand why you are doing what you’re doing).
- Bring along your child’s favorite activities, such as crayons and paper. Also bring any especially calming items: a lucky rock, a bunny rabbit, playdoh, bubbles, etc. An older child may feel less trapped if he can listen to his favorite music over headphones or bring a book.
- Give your child the sensory input she needs. If your child needs to jump and crash 20 times before sitting down to eat, do it. Now is a great time to explain your child’s sensory needs and how you are empowering him to manage them.
- A hearty walk is a great idea after a big meal, and helps with digestion. Walk through a pile of leaves, stomp in the snow. Roll down the closest hill.
- Just because you dress up for the holidays doesn’t mean it’s worth forcing your child into clothing that will make him miserable. Scratchy lace and bows on girls’ dresses may be too irritating. Your son may be unable to tolerate a tie and dress shoes. But you never know, your child might love her special holiday outfit! Give it a test drive several times before the event, and bring a change of clothing just in case. As always, the key is to be flexible!
- Bring along your child’s pillow and/or bedding if you plan to stay overnight. Bring a nightlight, white noise machine, or any other bedtime necessity.
Holiday food issues
- Don’t force your child to eat something “gross” just because it’s the mandated holiday food. If you know your child won’t eat turkey, bring along something nutritious he will eat. Certainly offer him some turkey; this may be the time he’ll finally try it, especially if there are beloved relatives who seem to like it. If need be, explain to others that you think food battles are unproductive, and that you are working on expanding your child’s food choices. Sure, they may think you’re overindulgent, but that’s far better than engaging in a food battle likely to lead to a meltdown!
- If your child reacts badly to sweets, be prepared. Holidays gatherings often include candies, cakes, and sodas. Bring along acceptable desserts you know your child enjoys. This may be a great opportunity for you to introduce healthier desserts to others. But recognize that it’s going to be quite hard to maintain your no-sweets policy with your child when all the relatives are munching on holiday cookies and pies. If your child doesn’t have allergies, this might be the time to indulge in a special treat. Just be prepared for any behavioral reactions (increased physical activity, mood swings, or whatever) that crop up. For example, if you know your child gets hyper after eating some cookies, plan to do some physical activity immediately after she eats them.
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